Sigh

I've eaten half a piece of cheese pizza (200) today.  Which is 200 more calories than I intended.  Life is spiraling.  Maybe up, maybe down, I can't say for sure at this point.  My boyfriend of nearly three years broke up with me about a month ago.  I didn't eat for days and then wound up binging on everything.  It seems I've finally managed to get things under control, losing weight again, and I need to keep going.

I'm trying to lose as much weight as possible by the 16th...which is the three year anniversary of the day we met. Not necessarily to try and get him back, just to make him regret a little.  I have been able to meet other guys, but right now I still only have my ex in mind.  That's enough on that though.

The plan is to fast tomorrow and Tuesday, and drink ginger and green tea.  After that, for the week, to restrict any solid food intake to grapes.  I just need to get this weight off of me.  It is dragging me down, and I cannot stand it.  My goal for the end of November is 130 pounds.  I have to stick to this.  I have to be thin, I will shed my problems as I shed these pounds.

This is it.  Please help me.  Please, hold me to this dear blog.  You are the only one who knows, the only thing I can be honest with.  You and anyone who happens to chance across these pages, but I cannot believe anyone would.